I thought to myself, today is the day.
I’m going to write about it.
I’m going to write about what happened.
I’m going to write about, him.
So, I sat down and tried.
My perspective has changed so much over the last what, 20 years? I’m honestly sitting here thinking to myself, none of it matters.
When I tell you I married the most amazing man, I’m not lying.
He and I are a perfect match. If he’d let me match our clothes, I do it. This is how goofily in love I am STILL with my husband after 13 years together.
He’s my longest, most important relationship.
He’s end game.
When I go back and I think about “him”, I am sorry that I hurt him.
I have harbored a lot of guilt surrounding just how many times I think I might have hurt him, and even though he never said I love you directly to me, I now realize his actions were telling me so.
I could never see it, though. I was in full fledged survival mode. My brain was on overload… and good thing, right? To say anything different would be to regret children and experiences and love and, LIFE!
It’s the same here.
Everything about my life is different, and not one part of it would I change.
We are all right where we asked to be, aren’t we? That’s amazing, isn’t it?
After months of retrospection, I feel I’ve learned what I needed to learn, and it’s time to file away all of that “experience” under : Completed Charts.
The Confessional 